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Tuesday, April 12, 2005


Well fans, Pope Idol has been rocked by scandal. In our last episode, The Fonz defeated Bono in one of the most dramatic Catholic Karate finishes ever. Apparently, violence is nothing new to The Fonz.

According to an unofficial news report(forwarded to us by an anonymous fan who only identified herself as "Cat"), The Fonz attacked dreamy, puppydog-eyed Constantine(a contestant on a Pope Idol-like knockoff show on another network) at a concert on April Fools Day, 2004. The report only made news recently because of the incredible writing and photographic skills (word on the street says Pulitzer Prize is looming) and because of Constantine's inexplicable existence on an actual TV show. Now, the focus has turned to the attacker. The Fonz reportedly went beserk upon the onset of Constantine's "I Think I Love You" and attacked the Greek God, knocking all the veneers from his teeth.

Further research indicates The Fonz was a legendary underground bar fighter back in the 70's in rural (ok, redneck) Northern California. To date, she is the only woman to be kicked out of the Hell's Angels for violence.

Because of this issue, Pope Idol must say goodbye to The Fonz. In the interest of fairness, our last contestant, Bono, will be invited back to the competition as soon as his rehab from testicle recovery surgery is completed (ok, by the next post).

This is getting weirder by the minute. Shaun ouuuuuuuuut.

posted by Shaun at 9:45 AM
link |


Blogger little sister commented at 10:43 AM~  

Well, dang. I'm disappointed. I really wanted a tough pope, and now she's disqualified.

Sorry, Fonz. I really was pullin' for you.

Okay - so how are Madonna and J-Lo gonna compete? Or will it be a contest between Samuel L and Homer? Or J-Lo and Samuel L? Bono and Madonna?


Blogger Shaun commented at 10:48 AM~  

Patience my sista!! I'm making this up as I go!! Thats the beauty of reality tv blogs. Don't expect anything normal, though. Remember, this started with a hot dog eating contest and a karate bout. The pressure's on me to be creative here.

Blogger dashababy commented at 11:07 AM~  

NOOOOO!!!!! Bring the Fonz back!!!
I do not know how there is no dirt being dredged up on that wacko jacko,,, do you not watch the news or anything???
Jesus would not allow this. Hes probably tellin his dad right now and somebody is going to pay, bigtime, dont be surprised if Jacko spontaneously combusts right before your eyes. Maybe God is going to bring the Fonz back after 3 days. He does like drama and suspense you know.

Blogger Shaun commented at 11:13 AM~  

How dare you accuse Jacko of wrongdoing. Don't you know that you are sladering his good name? I'm reporting you to Google and the Man-Boy Love Association.

Blogger Shaun commented at 11:14 AM~  

ooops...that was SLANDERING, with an N.

Blogger KC commented at 11:53 AM~  


Not the Fonz!

Now I'm never going to watch this show again....

ah, who am I kidding, I'll be back tomorrow.

Blogger Random and Odd commented at 12:04 PM~  

I had a feeling she was going to get the boot. There is only so many bar fights you can get into before you mess with the wrong person.

I told you mom! I told you that they would think you were beating up Constantine and not giving him some monkey love.

You just don't know when to stop.

Blogger Cat commented at 1:10 PM~  

So THAT'S what happened to Connie's teeth...

See? Do you SEE?! This is what 200+ prayers gets you!! Woo-woo!! Sorry, Fonzarelli. Bono is MY Pope Idol.

Blogger kimmyk commented at 1:47 PM~  


Blogger Shaun commented at 2:22 PM~  

Glad your guy is back, Cat. Some people pray for world peace, some people pray to have their favorite contestant advance on a blog contest.

Blogger The Fonz commented at 5:46 PM~  

I'm down for the count 1-2-3

Blogger Pissy Britches commented at 6:05 PM~  

I want the Fonz back..who is judging this fucking competition anyway?

Anonymous God commented at 9:08 PM~  

Stephanie, I am judging this. You will not question ME (sound of thunder)

Blogger Pissy Britches commented at 7:30 AM~  

Damn, God is in da house..I think I will shut up now. God scares me.

Blogger Tina commented at 6:39 PM~  

Ok so what do we have to do to get Hommer kicked to the curd and the fonz brought back?

Blogger butterstar commented at 9:08 PM~  

yeah! Bono is back! Sorry, Fonz. He's totally my pope idol.

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This is ONLY a blog. If this had been actual news, it wouldn't be as funny and you'd be watching it on TV, where everything is true.





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