Wednesday, September 21, 2005
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Random and Odd
Saturday, June 11, 2005
OK, for the first post back, I decided to ease myself back slowly so I wouldn't pull a creative muscle (not with the kids in the house anyway). A few weeks back, I went to an Oakland A's-New York Yankees game. The beauty of travelling to glorious Oakland CA is really quite something.
There's A's fans, there's Yankee fans....but mostly a lot of beer fans.
The people of Oakland, my birthplace(historical birthplace plaque pending), are often expressive. This upstanding young gentleman decided he was so excited by the sporting even that he's dance on top of his buddy's car for the viewing pleasure of the parking lot traffic.
BART, or Bay Area Rapid Transit, has a station outside the stadium for those looking to exit quickly and without the headaches of congestion. Those people are still there. This isn't even a photo, its a real-time video.
The bird gangs in Oakland are scary. Following the game, SWARMS of these flying rats attack everything even remotely resembling food orfood packaging. I REALLY shouldn't have worn my In N Out Burger cologne. These animals will NEVER become extinct. Ever.
Monday, May 23, 2005
Thursday, May 19, 2005
So I pulled the boy out of school and we went to see Star Wars. Don't know if that makes me a good dad or a bad dad, but we had fun. My dad used to pull me out of school when the original Star Wars movies came out, and I thought it was the coolest thing.
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
I'm suffering from blogger's block, so just posting a self-portrait w/guest pic of me and my daughter. Any excuse to post a pic of me in a pink feather boa. I'm such a whore.
Monday, May 16, 2005
I KNEW it!!!! Nobody gets massages that often!!
Friday, May 13, 2005
6. Optional male or female crawls on the channel at all times. Men can check out the scores, women can check out who Brad Pitt is dating this week.
7. Completely Sexist Shows. Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays: Female Dorm Cam.... Tuesday, Thursday, Saturdays: Construction Worker Cam (see ladies, I got yo back!!).
8. No talk shows. If I wanted to hear rambling, I'd call my ex-wife and ask her how her day is going.
9. Public Service Announcements must actually be helpful. How to sabotage co-workers' promotional opportunities, how to use porn lines as practical joke props, how to sneak into movie theaters.
10. Game shows are ok, but only if negative results include physical harm and/or death. Lets see those fuckers bid on their showcase if the loser gets dropped into a pit of hungry crocodiles (be sure to have your crocs spayed or neutered...hey, my first PSA).
Disclaimer For The Stupid
This is ONLY a blog. If this had been actual news, it wouldn't be as funny and you'd be watching it on TV, where everything is true.
Other Slow Children
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